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Chicago Superfans of SNL fame to help sell “da best” sausages in Chicagoland

April 1, 2020

With multiple sports leagues such as the NBA, NHL and MLB currently putting their seasons on pause, the Chicago Superfans of SNL fame desperately needed something else to lavish their attention and affections on—and found that in Scott Pete Polish Sausages.

Four of the five Superfans—Bill Swerski, his brother Bob, Pat Arnold, and Tom Wollarski—have joined the marketing team at Scott Pete, famed maker of Chicago-style Polish Sausages since 1926.

“Dat’s right,” says Bob Swerski. “Scott Pete’s Polish Sausages and Hot Dogs are bigger, bolder and got better flavor—which is only befitting for a city of champions, don’t ya think?”

“Dat’s why dey call dem da ‘flavor of Chicago,’ der Bob,” says Bob’s brother Bill.

Effective immediately, the Chicago Superfans’ new job responsibilities include getting every Bears- and Bulls-loving sports fan from Wrigleyville to the South Side to try Scott Pete products as soon as humanly possible.

“I don’t think it’ll be dat hard of a task,” says Chicago Superfan Pat Arnold. “Scott Pete Smoked Sausages are smoked perfectly—just like da Patriots in da 1986 Super Bowl.”

“Cheers to Da Bearrrrs,” the other new marketers all add.

Unfortunately, Ditka was unavailable for comment at the time of this press release’s writing. Happy April Fools’ Day, everyone!